Featured on Big Blended Family.
Last Saturday, I drove to my ex’s house, and got into the car with my daughters’ stepmother Molly. Both of my girls were with us, as well as Molly’s children. The girls needed clothes, and Molly negotiated with my ex the amount for each of us to spend on the kids. We decided it would be easier to take them shopping together, and that the girls might enjoy it.
The greatest advantage to co-parenting effectively together is that when we need to be around one another there is no awkwardness. The best thing about our shopping trip was that Molly and I helped one another. She would look for something with one of the girls, while I helped watch the babies. My youngest was easy to shop for, while my teenager was more of a challenge (age-appropriate differences, of course!). She only wanted short, tight shorts. Molly and I stood together on all decisions. We stuck with the amount of money we had decided upon before going, and we agreed on all of the clothes we bought for them. Honestly, it was not awkward in the least. I respect her completely, and consider her my parenting partner.
Our shopping trip together was so much easier than going on two separate shopping trips, and to have both of their “moms” participating gave the girls a sense of security. When we finished with the shopping trip, we picked up lunch. I went into their house, and ate with them before the girls and I came home. It means so much to the girls that both of their parents and stepmother can all sit and have a meal together. We don’t say catty things to one another, we don’t roll our eyes or belittle one another. We are a team.
Molly also noticed a purse that I liked, and she bought it for me. My girls’ stepmom bought me a gift, just because I liked it. Now that’s big.
Would you consider taking your stepchildren shopping with their mom or your children with their step-mom?
Trish Eklund is taking a nontraditional approach to parenting children after divorce and remarriage. Raising her two daughters of ten and fourteen with her husband, ex-husband, and his wife, they consult one another on all parenting decisions. Trish has been featured on www.playground-magazine.com, and www.bigblendedfamily.com. She is a regular writer on www.herviewfromhome.com, writer and co-editor for Her View From Omaha. Follow her on Twitter: @trishiewriter, Google +, and Pinterest.